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Level 1 Code BLUE LOLMets (Insignificant)

  • Jay Horwitz's habit of butt dialing/tweeting
  • The muscular fan who struggled to open the water bottle
  • TV camera catches Mets fan falling down in the background of a shot.
  • Lucas Duda breaks his wrist while moving furniture
  • LaTroy Hawkins and Jordany Valdespin both take baseballs to the junk in the same season

Level 2 Code GREEN LOLMets (Low)

  • Daniel Murphy's paternity leave
  • Jeff Francoeur's game-ending unassisted triple play
  • Mike Pelfrey falling off the mound or drops the ball, or balks in a number of odd ways
  • Mets ask cougar site to help vote David Wright for the All-Star game
  • Mets trade Marlon Byrd a few hours before Marlon Byrd t-shirt night
  • Matt Harvey tweets a picture of himself flipping the bird

Level 3 Code YELLOW LOLMets (Noteworthy)

  • The Amway at Citi Field
  • The fallout from Carlos Beltran's knee surgery
  • Mike Pelfrey's handlicking
  • Mets make changes to event honoring American Indians, upset them
  • David Wright's giant helmet
  • Lucas Duda and Ryne Sandberg get food poisoning from Citi Field Shake Shack
  • Miguel Batista calls the Mets "the best team in baseball"

Level 4 Code ORANGE LOLMets (Outstanding)

  • Bobby Bonilla's contract
  • Matt Harvey's Qualcomm Interview
  • The Walter Reed Hospital flap with Oliver Perez, Luis Castillo, and Carlos Beltran
  • Luis Castillo's dropped popup
  • Tony Bernazard tearing his shirt off and challenging the Binghamton Mets to a fight.
  • The botched Ryan Church concussion treatment
  • Ownership backs out of deal with David Einhorn
  • Jordany Valdespin incites Pirates rage, later calls Terry Collins a bad word

Level 5 Code RED LOLMets (Extreme!)

  • The Omar Minaya/Adam Rubin "Has Lobby" press conference
  • Francisco Rodriguez punching his father in-law
  • Fred Wilpon's New Yorker Interview
  • The late season collapses in 2007 and 2008 (also prominently featuring the "sad Mets fan")
  • Willie Randolph getting fired on the west coast after a win at 3 AM EST

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